MY STORY
I am Steve and this is a snapshot of my story.
How did I get here? How did God uniquely write my story to get to this chapter today where he has led me to encourage and exhort men on a similar journey? I’m glad you asked. I’ll give you the short version here and if something aligns with your story as you read mine, you can contact me and we can take a deeper dive together.
One thing I have discovered in life is that we are all shaped by our family of origin for good attributes and well, not so good attributes. The key is to become aware of how they have impacted you and then work toward healing, and emotional and mental health.
My parents weren’t perfect. None of us are. They did what they thought was best. We all do. I don’t blame them one second for any of the things they did or said or how they impacted me for over 50 years. I have spent my time in therapy coming to terms with who I am and why I chose to do the things I did and I own every one of them. I will say this:
It took me 54 years to wipe the face of my earthly father off the face of God.
I call it the “Father Eclipse.” I had to move my father out of my life for 2 years in order to understand and grow to love my Abba - even though I have a seminary degree stuck between my ears. You see, we learn a lot about God in our heads through knowledge and reading the Bible, and hearing great sermons preached at us. But I am an experiential learner, and it wasn’t until I reached the age of 54 that I really understood grace. I needed a hole punched from my head to my heart to open up my eyes and ears to experience true freedom as a Beloved Son of the King. I have been in love with the Father ever since!
I was born and raised in a religious family where we checked the boxes by going to church and making sure we did all the “right things” the Bible tells us to do and avoid all the things we are not “supposed” to do. Sound familiar?
I “prayed the prayer” at age 10 and became a Christian. I have no clue what that meant but everyone at camp that day was “accepting Christ” so I did too. I went to youth group all the way through high school and was a good student and worked my way through college, but this “Christian” thing was only a Sunday-thing for me. God used some unique incidents in my life that broke me and brought further transformation.
It has not been an easy road. In fact, getting emotionally healthy has been the hardest thing I’ve ever had to do in my life. It took 27 years of marriage (at the time) and my wife encouraging me to seek professional help before life began to crumble around me. She saw how wounded I was and how it was impacting me, our marriage and our children. I was fathering just like my dad. I was all up in their grills about their behavior and not listening to or hearing their hearts. I was the doting Christian husband and father, but inside I had no clue who I was and how God was allowing me to wander - for a time - before he rescued me.
I believe you are living a story that is significant, and what I have found over the years, God is in the business of redeeming stories. If your heart resonates with any part of my story, let’s talk and see what God does with it.
Background: Steve Cummings earned his Masters of Divinity from Denver Seminary and has led men’s groups and counseled men in SoCal and now in Georgia for the past 38 years. Steve is certified by the Georgia Board of Examiners as a Pastoral Counselor. Steve has been married to Julia for 36 years and they have four married children and four grandchildren.